Sacred Pleasure: Lactation and Masturbation Heal Women’s Deepest Wound

When a woman reclaims her body through self-directed pleasure and embodied practices, like inducing lactation for pleasure, she is not indulging desire—she is reversing a long history of disembodiment and restoring her right to experience her body as sovereign, intelligent, and self-knowing.

There are histories written into the body that no textbook can fully capture. The Chalice and the Blade by Riane Eisler describes early human cultures in which the female form was not segregated into categories of purity or utility, but understood as part of a continuum of creation. Archaeological traces—goddess figurines, fertility symbols, vulva carvings—suggest not eroticisation in the modern sense, but reverence: the body as origin, not object.

In Sacred Pleasure, Eisler pushes this further, arguing that the suppression of women’s embodied intelligence was not incidental but structural. To disconnect a woman from her body is to weaken her access to her own inner authority. A body that is not fully inhabited is easier to define from the outside.

Disconnecting women from their bodies was never an accident. It was a strategy.
Read that again—and let it land somewhere deeper than thought.

For many women, the body is not simply lived in—it is negotiated with. Managed. Observed. Sometimes distanced from entirely. And yet beneath that conditioning remains something older, quieter, and more intelligent: the body as an inner authority, a source of knowing that predates language and resists erasure.

A woman who is reconnected to sensation—who feels rather than performs her experience—becomes harder to control and is more independent (this is actually connected to the ancient meaning of “virgin”). She notices more quickly what feels aligned and what does not. She trusts internal signals over external interpretation. In many therapeutic frameworks, this is described as the return of interoception: the ability to sense the body from within, rather than living at a cognitive distance from it.

It is here that embodiment practices take on their deeper meaning.

Not as performance. Not as identity. But as return.

For some women, that return happens through breath, movement, or stillness. For others, through self-directed touch that is not goal-oriented, but exploratory—an unlearning of distance from one’s own skin through self-pleasure or masturbation. And for some, through more unconventional forms of embodiment such as induced lactation, not as a maternal function, but as a way of engaging the body’s capacity for adaptation, responsiveness, pleasure and biological transformation.

In clinical contexts, induced lactation is recognised in adoptive and inclusive reproductive care as a physiological process that can be stimulated outside of pregnancy. But in a broader symbolic sense, some women describe it as a way of re-encountering the body as generative beyond identity categories—an experience of physical capability that interrupts the narrative of the body as static, decorative, or depleted. Sexologists Masters and Johnson documented that sexual response is deeply linked to relaxation, safety, and nervous-system state—not simply stimulation. When the body shifts out of chronic stress and into parasympathetic regulation, sensation, responsiveness, and pleasure pathways become more accessible. Jungian Marion Woodman researched and wrote for many decades on how trauma is stored in women’s bodies which connects to these themes.

Masters and Johnson also discovered that nipple stimulation produced deep intrauterine contractions in most women causing them orgasm and increased vaginal lubrication, as I experienced myself when using a breast pump to induce lactation. This explained my heightened state of arousal throughout the day every time I used the breast pump to continue inducing/keep up the milk supply and led me to deeper research, confirming what was in available in the scarce literature on that subject: that inducing lactation would often cause orgasms and lead to masturbation in most women, acting as a portal for self-exploration and providing deep healing of women’s most ancient of wounds, connected with the demonisation of sexuality and women’s bodies, preventing women from being fully present or enjoying sex fully.

What matters here is not the form itself, but what it disrupts: the idea that the body is finished, defined, or only meaningful through external roles (wife/mother) and that physical touch outside of reproduction and simply for pleasure is sinful (even with our own partners). Regrettably this idea still lives on today in society and many religions, especially, Christianity.

Across many psychological and somatic frameworks, reconnection with bodily awareness is associated with reduced shame, improved emotional regulation, and a stronger sense of agency. When a woman is no longer habitually overriding her internal cues, something fundamental shifts in how she relates not only to herself, but to intimacy, boundaries, and connection.

This is why embodiment is often felt most acutely in relationships.

Because intimacy is not only about closeness to another person—it is about whether a person is present to themselves while being close. In sexless or emotionally distant relationships, what is often missing is not only desire, but access: access to sensation, to safety, to internal permission.

When that access begins to return, intimacy does not automatically become easier—but it becomes more honest. Less performative. More rooted in what is actually felt rather than what is expected.

This is the deeper movement underneath what is often called “sexual healing”: not the pursuit of heightened experience, but the restoration of self-presence within experience.

A woman who returns to her body in this way is not becoming someone new. She is shedding the learned distance that once helped her survive. She is re-entering a form of self-trust that does not depend on external validation to confirm its reality.

And in that return, something quiet but irreversible happens.

The body is no longer an object to be interpreted.

It becomes a place to live again.

From my own experience, it was only when I began to engage with my own forgotten and suppressed sensuality that I truly started to heal. Not because sensuality solved my problems, but because it returned me to myself. After years of trauma, loss, difficult relationships, and living almost entirely in my mind, like most women, I had become disconnected from my body. I could analyse my pain, explain it, even teach others about it—but I could not feel fully alive within my own skin.

Reclaiming sensuality became an act of remembrance.

It meant slowing down enough to listen again. To stop treating my body as an object to be managed and instead begin relating to it as something intelligent. Something responsive. Something that speaks in sensation long before it speaks in words. Pleasure, in this context, was not excess—it was information. Softness was not weakness—it was re-entry.

What I discovered is that healing is not only cognitive. Insight alone does not bring a person home. Sometimes the return happens through sensation, through the gradual rebuilding of trust with the body after years of abandonment.

Part of that journey, for me, involved reconnecting with my breasts in a way that modern culture rarely encourages. Through the practice of induced lactation, I discovered an entirely new relationship with my body—one that was nurturing, sensual, creative, and profoundly healing all at once. What began as curiosity and research became a form of embodiment, a daily ritual of presence and self-connection. It invited me to slow down, to listen, and to engage with parts of myself that had long been neglected.

Historically, the breast was never viewed solely as a maternal organ although we have suppressed this. Across many cultures it carried symbolic associations with fertility, nourishment, pleasure, wisdom, abundance, and the sacred feminine. Whether one approaches lactation as a spiritual practice, an expression of bodily autonomy, a healthcare routine, a sensual exploration (solo or shared with a partner), or simply an act of self-discovery, it offers an opportunity to experience the body in a deeply intimate way. Research has also linked breastfeeding and lactation with a reduced lifetime risk of certain cancers, reminding us that the relationship between women and their breasts extends far beyond appearance alone.

Even in clinical contexts, induced lactation is recognised as a physiological process that can be supported outside of pregnancy. But beyond the medical framing, what interests me is what it reveals: that the female body is not fixed. It is responsive. Adaptive. Alive in ways most women are never taught to feel consciously.

What I find most meaningful is that practices such as breast massage, erotic lactation, and conscious connection with the breasts invite women to reclaim dimensions of themselves that are often overlooked. We are more than roles. More than mothers, wives, partners, professionals, or caretakers. We are sensual, creative, feeling beings with a rich inner life. Reconnecting with that aspect of ourselves is not selfish—it is an act of remembrance. For me, it became a way of welcoming back a part of the feminine that had been silenced for far too long: not merely the nurturing woman, but the embodied, vital, sensual woman who feels fully alive within her own skin.

I would also be dishonest if I did not acknowledge the deeply empowering aspect of being desired in this way. There is something profoundly affirming about feeling that a part of your body so often reduced to appearance alone can become the object of genuine fascination, reverence, and wonder. Throughout history, milk has been associated with nourishment, abundance, divine blessing, and sacred femininity. In mythology and religious art, goddesses, queens, and holy women were often depicted as bearers of life-giving sustenance, their milk symbolising vitality, wisdom, and resurrection.

For me, part of the appeal of lactation lies in reclaiming that symbolism. To experience the body not merely as something to be looked at, but as something capable of nourishing, transforming, and inspiring awe. There can be something deeply sensual in feeling desired for that capacity, in recognising that the female body contains dimensions of power that extend far beyond conventional notions of beauty. Whether understood as ritual, embodiment, intimacy, or personal exploration, it invites us to remember that femininity has always contained both nurturing and erotic dimensions, and that neither needs to diminish the other. Perhaps what moves me most is the feeling of sovereignty it brings.

The knowledge that my body is capable of extraordinary things, that it can change, adapt, create, nourish, and surprise me. In a culture that often teaches women to view their bodies through the eyes of others, reconnecting with these capacities can be a deeply liberating act—one that restores confidence, vitality, and a profound sense of belonging within one’s own skin.

Thus, re-engaging with sensuality in my experience became a bridge back to vitality. It awakened creativity that had gone dormant, restored confidence I thought I had lost, and the hunger for having sexual moments, reminding me that my body was not simply a vessel carrying wounds, but a source of wisdom, pleasure, intuition, life and power.

In reclaiming that connection, I was not becoming someone new. I was returning to someone I had always been…

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 Elayne (Sophia Unveiled)