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i was talking to someone in the last 3 weeks and they were replying. now they are just viewing my messages and not responding.
has this happened to anyone else?
Happens all the time. Such is life.
I have learning..
Ghosting = They’re just not that into it..Such is life.. move on w grace
It may not be considerate, but it’s de-facto “normal” in our brave new on-line world.
There are many reasons, some of them are uncool (e.g. solipsistic levels of narcissism) and some that can be somewhat understandable. For example, once you’ve felt the frightening, searing, insane, vengeful wrath of someone who was politely told “no” but won’t accept it, you too may decide that ghosting is preferable to risking that polite “no.”
It will only hurt yourself to get upset or assign blame, so when it happens (and it will!), just shrug and move on without allowing it bother you.
It can be hard, but after the 100th time, it gets a lot easier.
I’ve had one or two people talk to me for a few days and then disappear out of the blue.
Just take it as a “dodging a bullet” sort of thing. Don’t take it personal.
I have it done as well as done to a few. On my part, the conversation became inappropriate or didn’t evolve
I can assure you that I never have ghosted and never wi…
Yep. Cest la vie. It’s difficult not to know the reason why. Better just to move on.
“disappearing act” is very common in on-line life…..irrespective of the website….infact if it does not happen, then you should be surprised!!
Expectations are something that are individual and should probably be expressed and discussed up front in order to avoid miscommunication. Obviously, if you talked to the person for 3 weeks you would have or should have exchanged what you expected of the messaging friendship. If you didn’t then your messaging didn’t evolve and that persons expectations weren’t met.
I’ve had a lot, on this site and off who talk to me, sometimes for months, then just disappear.
I don’t beholden them to converse with me. I don’t expect them to always respond, whether at all or in a timely manner. If they don’t, they don’t. Either they got what they needed and have moved on, or life has gotten hold of them and dragged them off. Or they found someone they liked to talk to better. Or any number of reasons that probably have nothing to do with me.
It isn’t up to me to be upset about it happpening. I just enjoy the time we talked, as long as it was pleasant, and wish them well.
thanks everyone
i dont know if it is something i said. at first they were happy to tell me about their experience but then they stopped replying suddenly. i was being respectful
thats par for the course on here, always happens exchange a couple of messages then nothing, its a total waste of time,
tony…
sweetheart…
The person who started this thread… and who last responded… has ghosted. You’re wasting your time. You’re doing what you’re accusing other people of.
While we’re here I’ll build a little campfire to keep us warm. We’ll have a weenie roast. I just want to clarify that I’m really witnessing something. I just want to make sure I’m not completely going crazy, and that we all still do, in fact, share an “objectively real” base-reality. This one’s for the forum lurkers, less-so for the “participants.”
We all assume that we go about our day sharing an “objectively real universe,” wherein we can all see that tony has responded to an Anonymous / inactive ghost, who was poetically, ironically, “complaining about ghosting.” To agree with the post-ghosting ghost, adding that it’s a “total waste of time” that, to my mind, masterfully doubles down on the poetic irony of a thread by a ghost complaining about ghosts. Responding to that ghost, complaining about wasting time, is the double-down. We are now at def-con level: double-stuff hydrox parody.
I must include myself in this wonderfully fractal landscape as well, of course. There I am, with my campfire and weenies, hangin’ with tony. I’m right there in the mix. And now, I think we have a prestine, explicit and honest representative cross-section of the community this website somehow attracts.
It’s very unique to the internet, this community. I’ve never seen anything like it, anywhere. I’ve been pretty much everywhere on this thing since 1992. The top side, the underground, I’ve never seen human interactions like this before. Anywhere.
I’m not making this up. You, are not making this up. We’re sharing it, it’s all real, it’s all right in front of us: the immaturity, the adolescent circus of gender issues, but let’s take a moment to spotlight the real star of the show: the sheer *obliviousness* and let’s repeat that word, because it’s absolutely vital: the Obliviousness at the helm and handlebars of the “participant.” And in turn, collectively, the blind leading the blind, en masse. It’s beyond staggaring. As such, it’s particularly noteworthy. It’s unique.
I’m appalled by it. Honestly. Simply appalled.
Have you seen the “Harvey” thread? Have you seen these hornets descending upon this hapless fool? Oblivious, on all sides. A swarm of Verified badges, just having at each other’s oblivious models of reality. The ideological bifuraction is acute, in large part due to none of them knowing what that means or how they’re building its fence. It’s a playground. It’s a dirt clod fight. It’s what you might refer to as a psychological shit-show, if you were being crude and frank about it.
I’ve never witnessed a social experience quite like this before. It’s shocking. It’s absolutely shocking in a way I can’t look away from. I’m fascinated! This is some kind of untouched “boomernet,” in here. The community at-large is mechanically, literally, inescapably too oblivious to know this about itself. The genders on this website are oblivious peas in pods, perfect antagonistic agents, God himself couldn’t have planned a more subtle chaotic pairing of the violently dim witted self-righteous pitted against the hopelessly clueless traditionalist.
Part of me wants to believe that this is a vast play I’m witnessing, a kind of put-on; and that our shared reality isn’t this insane in earnest. I want to believe that things are not this tragically lost down a hopeless spiral of unaware ego nonsense. It can’t be. Please don’t let it be. But, alas; the conspiracy necessary to implement such a facade would be monumental, and who could write such a thing? The gentle rattling of the drays is all I know and do, and I’m telling you: you literally cannot make this stuff up. This community is a novelty unto itself.
If you can stomach it, and you’re looking for the “edge:” forget Huxley, forget Blair, this place is beyond Fin’s Wake. We’ve broken through to the Cosmic Wow, here. This community is true art. Life immitating parody, in a cartoon insistence that its madness be upheld as legitimate.
I like my weenies a bit burnt, only just. Ah, and that’s just right. Can’t wait to tuck in. I’ll just leave this comfy bivuac here for anyone who needs to stay sheltered from the unchecked and unmitigated ideological gales that blow through here, freezing everyone solid. Help yourself to a weenie and have a great day!
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