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This is a great website to be educated about ABF and ANR. But I was wondering if anyone has developed a successful relationship from here or not and what that entailed.
Participants who have had success finding someone on ABFHeaven and wish to answer the following may do so.
1. Did you or they reach out first?
2. What was the main purpose of meeting them in person?
3. How long did you talk with them before meeting them in person?
4. How far did you/they travel to meet for the first time?
5. How many times have you met them after the first time?
6. If measured, who had more experience in ABF?
7. Were there any expectations that was held true, in which, you can recall profoundly after meeting them multiple times?
8. Has ABF with this person changed your life? If so, why them specifically? Briefly explain, preferably in one sentence.
9. Are there days that you wish you could do more with ABF? If so, explain how you would involve or not involve them to answer that question/wish.
10. What made them reach out to you or what made you reach out to them? What did you bond over specifically to develop an ABF relationship on this website and transition over to real life?
Hi, thats a lot of questions! I will try my best. May be cannot answer them all at once.
1. It isnt important who reaches out first. Mostly they did.
2. Yes I have met people irl, but its very different each time. My goal is the same: see if its possible to develop something long term. I discovered the importance of being on the same page, meaning people say they have the same goals but it is t always true. So stick to your goal and do not give in because one of you travelled to meet.Meeting depends on defferent things and was once coincidentally, because i happened to travel at that time, which was planned long before we met online.
3. How long we talked? Depends. Sometimes very dhort because we hsppened to be nearby. Let’s have a coffee. Sometimes longer, because of the distance, or because i didnt feel comfortsble meeting yet. And messaging doesnt always end up meeting someone.
Distance is important. If someone is nearby its easier to meet to see if this good be a match. Meetings do not always lead to nursing. If its not a match, I dont want to.3. Sometimes we texted a couple of times, sometimes it lasted weeks or months.
2. I must add its a big bonus of this site you make friends. There are people on this site I’d love to meet, just because I consider them my friends. That changes the goal: its not about nursing, but about the person.
Hi AMN, it reads a bit like a job interview but thanks for posting some thought-provoking questions.
I don’t have the answers but I know that there have definitely been some success stories on here.
As Daisy said, each situation is different and unique. In general, I would say that it is better not to have too many expectations; the more two people chat beforehand the higher the chance of discovering alignment (or otherwise) and the greater the possibility of success at a meeting, whatever the agreed objective of the meeting may be.
The key for me is to interact with pleasant, respectful, humorous and kind people who enhance my life. I am not constantly thinking “Can I suckle on your breasts?” over everyone who happens to have them.
It is a long-term project; be yourself, communicate well, give and take rejections gracefully and most of all stay positive.
Many success stories from here.
ITS NOT COMPLICATED
Meeting someone from here is just like every other kind of dating. It’s the whole package just like regular dating except here you know the other enjoys nursing. If you are looking at this as just suckling tits you’ll never get far.
Personally- even though this is ABF site- I’m 95 % of the time looking for someone I can meet that I could see having a LTR ANR and not a couple for ABF meets
Talk with those that you could actually meet- not fair to to other if everything you say is BS because you’ll never go to Minneapolis because you hate cold, for instance Or you can see the other is thin and you like a more rounded figure.
Don’t lie, cheat or steal
If it was meant to happen — it will!!
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