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I did not want to highjack Water Lily’s forum post asking if men could date or be in a relationship with a woman That has a Only Fans or similar site.
To say that I am surprised and appalled by someone the comments would be an understatement. But it does leave me with a lot of questions. I would really like to hear from the men that commented on Water Lily’s post, but I also welcome the opinions of anyone.
First, how do nude photos on this site compare to content on only fans?
Does the content on this site being free somehow change things since a woman is giving it away versus selling?
Do you consider Fetlife content different from Only Fans since it’s free content versus paid?
Are we not all selling ourselves for something? We all or at least the majority on this site go to work and perform a task and use our bodies and brains to make a living.
How is that different from creating content for Only Fans?
How do you view women that would put their tit in your mouth for free outside the scope of a “committed relationship”?
Is a woman that nurses outside of a “committed relationship” relegated to the same lowly level of a woman creating content for Only Fans?
i will give my view on the last 2 paragraphs.
i dont believe nursing outside a relationship is “free” because it is not a “product”. if two people have a mutual want to nurse/be nursed then why is it considered giving something away “for free”?
i was debating with a woman in chat a few weeks ago and was called “entitled” because i said why should men be expecting to pay a woman if both have a mutual want?
It’s not up to me to judge the choices anyone makes. If you want to share pictures on a free site or a paid site, go for it.
And if not, nobody has the right to expect anything from you. It’s really not that complicated.
I’ve not spent anytime viewing OF content.
I’m my opinion earning a buck is earning a buck. My employer gets the benefit of my knowledge, experience and other abilities. I am compensated for it. OF viewers look at content and the presenters are compensated for it.
Maybe it’s more of a “Moral” question for some.Interesting questions … my own perspective included inline for your consideration:
First, how do nude photos on this site compare to content on only fans?
I don’t subscribe to OF or any other paying site. I’m on ABFH to meet women who may need help when I’m eventually in a position to help them … I’m not expecting to be asked to be paid. I’ll be paying enough in travel and living expenses to put us both up in a hotel somewhere for the duration of time I am helping them.
Does the content on this site being free somehow change things since a woman is giving it away versus selling?
The media content on this site is secondary to me. I don’t expect women to put up photographs or videos of any kind, though SFW photos might help support what I’ve read in their profiles. I’ve put up only SFW photographs on this site in order to support what I say about myself in my profile.
Do you consider Fetlife content different from Only Fans since it’s free content versus paid?
Yes, I consider FL content different from OF content because it is enjoyment for the owner to offer the photographs for the enjoyment of the reader. It is not done as a source of revenue. I think the incentives differ greatly. The owner of the FL material might be into any part of the spectrum from exhibitionism through to in-person sex.
Are we not all selling ourselves for something? We all or at least the majority on this site go to work and perform a task and use our bodies and brains to make a living.
Indeed we are, yes.
How is that different from creating content for Only Fans?
Not in any way whatsoever. As I say above, OF contributors are looking for a source of revenue. I don’t think FL contributors are. ABFH contributors are prohibited from using this site as a source of revenue by their membership commitment.
How do you view women that would put their tit in your mouth for free outside the scope of a “committed relationship”?
With great respect for their intention of being thrilled by the experience, or even, perhaps, for their intention of being helped in their journey to full lactation. I suspect some women are here for exhibitionism, and that is just fine … hopefully that would come out in the initial interactions with other members who are looking for real-world connections, both short-term and long-term.
Is a woman that nurses outside of a “committed relationship” relegated to the same lowly level of a woman creating content for Only Fans?
Heavens, NO! Not at all! A woman that nurses outside of a committed relationship commands as much respect as a woman who does so inside. Her needs have no less value.
For example, it is my intention to offer assistance for one- to three-week periods of time, 24/7, once I am able (I am mostly retired and I travel a lot all around the world). Few women here will be interested in what I have to offer, but I suspect (and hope) the number isn’t zero.
But what I offer won’t be of interest to a woman seeking a LTR, unless, perhaps, it is a short-term liaison to “jump-start” her lactation in the interim while she continues to look for her LTR partner. I think some women might be very interested in that, without having to wait to find her LTR partner in order to get started.
So, emphatically NO, a woman looking for a no-strings-attached short-term relationship, or one willing to go into one temporarily to help her while she is in the hunt for a strings-attached long-term relationship, MUST NOT be considered “lower” in stature than one who nurses only in a LTR.
I hope this feedback is what you were looking to consider.
. . . . . . Ken
@lusciousliz
Great questions, i hadn’t thought about what you you’ve mentioned. I think you’re asking for more clarity, which is great 😃@suckbuddyk
A thoughtful and thorough response Ken. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, I’m closely aligned with you on these particular issues Elizabeth brought up.First off, I agree 100% with Greg’s comment above. I couldn’t have expressed that thought any better than he did.
Please pardon me if I’m incorrect, but it sounds to me like the OP of this thread now has (or is thinking about starting) an OF page, and is shocked that “some” men consider that a “deal-killer”. Of course, any woman is free to express herself online any way she wishes. There is never going to be 100% agreement about the appropriateness of any voluntary act a human does.
Since I’m new to the “lifestyle” space, I don’t know the history of OF. I think it started as a more innocent platform for celebrities to develop their “brand” and ordinary folks to get props for their appearance from strangers. However, today OF has evolved (or maybe a better word would be devolved) into an online marketplace where women offer “adult” photos, videos, live video streams and used underwear, for a flat fee or subscription. In my opinion, if a woman is on the OF site in its current state, she is “guilty by association” with the majority of its posters, even if her page is there for non-commercial purposes.
As for why posting nudes for free on this site or other “lifestyle” sites like FetLife and Reddit is different than OF, it’s really pretty simple. It’s the environment of the platform that makes a difference. On this site, for example, Michael has created an atmosphere of camaraderie and commonality of purpose. I would think that a woman who posts a nude breast shot on this site is doing so to enhance the appeal of her profile to readers, just like a well-written profile essay enhances one’s attractiveness. But women have the advantage of displaying the beauty of the feminine form as an added appeal to their profile. Let’s face it — this site is all about the appreciation of the female breast and the nurturing only a woman can provide, so why not celebrate that with nudes from women who are comfortable with that display?
@suckbuddyk I appreciate your detailed response and your willingness to answer each question posed. Its obvious that you have a more progressive view in all of this, and along the way other will be appreciated of your views..
@suckbuddyk Ken, I’d say your answers parallel my sentiments closely. Liz andWater Lily raised good questions that I hadn’t needed to think about.
Thanks for shaking up the noggin ladies.🤗Not pardoned, I do not have a OF account, nor am I considering creating one. I also do not see anything wrong with OF, the content creators, or the people that patronize OF.
OF was not created for celebrities to develop a brand or build a fan base. It was a site built for sex workers to monetize their content. To say most people (it’s not just women) are using the site for “attention seeking” is grossly incorrect. The site is for professional as well as amateur content creators. Some celebrities have created accounts in the last 2 or so years, but that was not the site’s intended purpose.
While the site and Michael’s intentions are about the appreciation of the female breast, and connecting people, some users of this site do not behave in a manner consistent with the site’s purpose. Women are regularly objectified, sexualized, and reduced to nothing more than a pair of tits.
If a woman is posting a breast shot to “enhance the appeal of her profile” How is that different from posting on OF, Fet, or Reddit? The photo is posted for gain, be it attention, a relationship, hook up, personal pleasure, shared pleasure, monetary incentive, etc. I do not see how the reason determines the respect or lack of, given to women.
This post was not created to change anyone’s mind. You’re all entitled to your opinion. Despite what I may think of your replies to this post, and Water Lily’s, your comments are appreciated.
@lusciousliz
I agree. If I start an OF account, that means I am wanting to get paid, not be an “attention whore”, which is highly offensive.
Lots of women are single income and need supplemental income. Why should they be shamed for doing what others have done and sell pics and vids for profit. Just because they are nude/in sexual acts/etc makes it no less worthy of being paid. They deserve compensation for their time, effort, energy and willingness to put themselves on display to reciece comments from men pissed off they have to pay to see it.
The idea that women should give sex for free, whether in person or in media is laughable at best. In the case of media, it takes hours to set up one session, with lighting, setting, make up, posing, etc. Models get paid all the time for the same thing. Women in porn media get paid for the same thing. They aren’t called “attention whores” and have a massive amount of fans. How does that woman differ from an OF creator? Why does one deserve to be paid and the other not? Men think nothing of buying a porno or a nudie mag, but when a woman is trying to make a living it’s shameful?
Please explain these differences and why they exist. I’d really like to know why they should do all this for free.
@foxgoddess I think the attention whore thing is quite repulsive to say the least. Some of the guys stuck to the fact that they just wouldn’t be comfortable without without bashing or making snap judgemental about content creators. It’s also quite telling when someone says they wouldn’t pay for it. It tells me they want access to the spank bank but do not want to make a deposit/contribution.
I would also like to know if they hold the same opinion of male content creators. Are they lowly attention whores looking to capitalize and “degrade” themselves for the almighty buck?
I think that those on OF, Fetlife, or here are on these platforms for many different reasons. I’m shocked how easily people ban others for not being on platforms for the same reasons as them. I think that as long as you are open about your intentions and motivates,then no one should be sitting in judgement of you.
For instance, I’m not here to look for a relationship. I state that very clearly in my profile. I’m not here to hook up either. I don’t need someone to nurse on me. I’m in a very committed ANR relationship, he nurses on me. I have no interests in an intimate relationship outside of that relationship. I don’t need attention, he gives me all the attention I need. Plus, I have enough men in my home town gawking at my beasts everywhere I go, I don’t have to seek that attention on the internet.
I have learned a lot from this site though. I’ve also met some great people. Plus, I’m obsessed with doing the puzzles and have gone through all of them twice (except a few old ones that won’t load). I’m old enough to not give a rat’s ass if someone objects to my intentions on this site. I make them very clear and make sure no one I speak to is unaware of them.
Some people are on here exclusively for finding a relationship and I wish them well. Some guys are on here to just sext and jerk off to some pictures, whatever floats their boat. Some ladies are on here for the positive feedback and you know, some days you just need to feel pretty and sexy.
Whatever someone’s reasons for being here, let’s just be up front with our intentions and treat each other with respect.While I don’t have any inherent problems with OF, we can’t pretend their platform isn’t built around monetising. It’s not a website for self expression primarily, with some quirky donation feature tacked on. It’s a money making engine – for the owners and content creators. A model which I definitely think is a huge improvement over privately owned porn production companies, which often employ all manner of shady practices victimising the actors.
One knock-on effect of the OF explosion is how it seeped into platforms which were thriving before as nooks on the internet where people simply self expressed their sexuality for the sake of it. Now often Reddit subs, Fetlife & IG profiles (even Tinder pages!) are little more than funnels or downright baits for someone’s financial side hustle. I don’t have any problems with someone making money this way, I just don’t like how it spilled everywhere – I miss the times when people posted risque photos online because they felt inclined to do just that – show off, be playful, naughty, get some attention or thrill. Not to add a comment – “My OF is currently -20%, 3 month subscription gets you 50%. Limited offer”
I think in general that combining money and sex is a very tricky path to tread for anyone, even with ideal communication and honesty involved. In the name of keeping our sexual life’s healthy and drama free – I’d vote for staying clear of selling “nudes” if my partner brought it up, and I’ve had this temptation after a Fet profile, which I shared with my partner, reached a few thousand followers. Even though it was free, the line blurred at times – Are we having spontaneous sex? Are we taking pictures? Both? In what order? How revealing? Are you sure you want to reply to that guy? etc.
I keep seeing a tribe of women online, perhaps not a big one (but they’re vocal), who think that a man finding an issue with his partner having a OF page is just another example of misogyny, oppression and an attempt at controling her sexuality. Just my two cents 🤓
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