- This topic has 10 replies, 9 voices, and was last updated 1 month ago by
.
-
Posts
-
Hi
In conversation with men on this website I find they always say “how hard it is to find a woman that is on this site wanting a ABF or ANR”. Maybe one reason is the married men here increases the pool of men vs women at that site. Does this cut really cuts down the chances of a single guy finding a woman?
A married man really would not be in a stable position to real create a relationship yes a convenient drop in service, but nothing really real.
A man being married and wanting to participate in ABF with a woman not his wife is totally asking a lot yet a great set up for the married man that had an easy excuse legitimate excuse to drop in or not like a 7/11 candy store
What do you think?People can do what they want. I appreciate honesty about having a partner. Not sayi g anything is also lying.
I think we all have the right ( men and women) to make a well informed decision. Our health is involved. So be mature.
This is a very tough situation that might need a multifaceted view point if one is inclined to do so.
I only say that because I have chatted with married men who are wonderful people but according to them, they are just lacking the vital abf component in their lives because their SO cannot or does not see it as anything she can accommodate.
They have tried multiple times unsuccessfully to ask for this component to be a part of their marriage bed and it causes a rift in their relations where sometimes each becomes silent and looks the other way because they don’t relate to each other anymore. This can go on for years.
That strain in itself needs a lot of empathy from us to understand them whether we agree with them being here or not. If we can’t put ourselves in our fellow human being’s shoes without judging them then that needs a think as to why.
Life experience shows us that not everything is black and white and that there are a lot of nuances. There may be children in the marriage that the person is sacrificing their need for to be with someone for years silently enduring or loosing a part of themselves for. So listening to them is key and the label married is again just a label if we see the human being behind it who is not getting their needs fulfilled in the most basic way and can’t really articulate this need because the SO doesn’t think it’s important.
In terms of coming to the point of your post i.e. the ratio of the number of available single men to available single women, this does bring the ratio to more even numbers, because if most single women are running across this stumbling block then they keep being unsuccessful in finding an ANR.
On top of that if you add in the number of men single or married who aren’t seriously looking but are candy shopping then an ANR becomes so difficult.
On top of that if you add in the location into the equation the chances of finding an ANR is that much more difficult.
Then you have those who have multiple partners and want to keep both the numbers get skewed again for those wanting an ANR vs abf.
It’s actually a bit much for my brain at this point in time so 💕💕💕 🙂 🙂 🙂
But men can weigh in and we can all listen to each other with empathy and love without feeling like we are judging the other. That’s always a great starting point for any conversation, a judgement free, objective but empathetic discussion about things.
Please pardon me in advance if you feel like I said anything that gave offense, as none was intended. I am only weighing in on this having listened to the really wonderful men and seeing their suffering.
Right or wrong is not the point, it depends on the individual woman or man who decides to “see” the other and empathize with their need for abf that’s all. People decide to be here for multiple reasons and it’s all a matter of how we get along with love and affection is the best way in my opinion.
Sorry for the long post.. I just didn’t want to be misunderstood or yelled at for saying any of this so I ended up writing a lot I guess 🙂 🙂 🙂
Have a great day and start of the new week. 🤗
I think this assumes everyone here is looking for the same thing, though. Some people want an actual relationship. Some want an ANR partner. Some want friendship, fantasy, conversation, flirting, an occasional experience…or simply a place where they can talk openly about something they can’t exactly bring up at Tuesday night trivia.😏
So I’m not sure a married man necessarily “takes” a woman away from a single man any more than a woman who has no intention of dating anyone here does. She was never really in his dating pool to begin with.
Where I think it gets messy is when people aren’t honest about what they’re available for. If someone presents themselves as capable of offering a relationship when they’re really only available for the occasional 7/11 milk run, then yes, that’s unfair.
But I think the bigger problem may be assuming that because someone is on an ABF dating site, they must be here to find a traditional relationship.
I suspect there are a LOT more reasons people are here than their profiles let on.😎
Thank you for your insights.
“ But I think the bigger problem may be assuming that because someone is on an ABF dating site, they must be here to find a traditional relationship.” this is an enlightening statement. The approach to have to having a relationship, is complicated.@dairydaisy (Rumina). This was beautifully written and compassionate. I’m on the end of the spectrum where I’m looking for a relationship that is ANR centered, so while I would not talk to a married/partnered man, I don’t judge those who do. So long as everyone is informed and consenting, have at it.
As for anyone being dishonest about their relationship status, you know where you can go
The following is tongue in cheek; kind of. But it’s my unfiltered thoughts.
Whether you agree or not, have fun with your day.I try not to interact with married/attached men, and YES, one has to make a distinction after being caught out with one guy, to whom I had been talking with a view to meeting, stated that my profile only prohibited married men (eye roll)!.
And yes, I’m sure that there are married women on the site too but as I don’t interact with them and this is not about married women; let’s leave that to another post.
I am NOT the side dish, I am the main course. I want to be the main focus within any relationship, just as I will make him my main focus. Yes, it worked out for Camilla, but at what cost?
You’ve made a commitment to a woman and then you lie and cheat because your sexual needs are not being met! Boo hoo. Change your circumstances. I know that this isn’t always easy but who the dickens stated that aspects in life that we desire would be.
Self respect and dignity walked out the door the day you emotionally and physically cheated on your wife/partner. If you can’t be faithful to her, what chance do I have of retaining your interest or respect; zero to none, would be my guess.
Then let’s look at this from my point of view, as really that is the only point of view that I need!
You want me to suspend my self respect to cater for your part-time need; interesting. In exchange for you to use my body to satisfy your craving; deloo loo obviously.How arrogant, entitled and self deluded are you to think that you could adequately cater to more than one woman at a time, when you are already failing at the relationship with the women you committed yourself to and supposedly love! Aren’t I the lucky one to be the new focus for you because I have boobs.
You want me to set aside my needs and desires to cater for yours. Ok! (That’s a Chandler response right there)
There is only ONE relationship where that would ever happen, only one relationship where I would ever suppress my emotional and physical needs for another person and that only applies to the people I gave birth too!
Everyone else HAS to be on an equal footing for the relationship to thrive and grow and that can’t happen if it’s a tad crowded and someone has been left in the dark, namely, your wife/partner.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not averse to a throuple situation, but would you really want to physically and sexually interact with another guy? I’m game if you are!
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.