A POLITE REMINDER: messaging etiquette on ABFheaven

Personal Ads & Forum General Discussion A POLITE REMINDER: messaging etiquette on ABFheaven

Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)
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  • #456369
    Michael_Admin
    Keymaster
    • Male
    • Looking for: Female
    • United Kingdom

    When messaging someone for the first time, or sending a friend request, please read their profile first.

    If they clearly do not want to be contacted by you then please do not contact them.

    Example: a woman’s profile states “Female seeking Female” and in her About Me section she states “Men, please do not contact me”.

    Pretty clear, right?

    If you are a man and you simply ignore this and contact her anyway, you are breaking the rules of this site.

    What then happens?

    She can screenshot your unwanted message/friend request, and report you to Admin.

    Admin then warns you, or deletes your account if it happened before.

    Thanks for reading this polite reminder.

    #456374
    Nipple Me Please
    Participant
    • Male
    • Looking for: Female
    • USA
    • Georgia

    Makes sense, I have in the past made the error of sending a message to a lady in a way of “being nice” only later realizing that my

    #456376
    Nipple Me Please
    Participant
    • Male
    • Looking for: Female
    • USA
    • Georgia

    Only later realizing that I was actually being rude.
    Sometimes “just being nice” really isn’t that at all.
    Lesson learned

    #456448
    Nick
    Participant
    • Male
    • Looking for: Female
    • USA
    • New York

    Occasionally it happens by mistake. There is no way to cancel message.
    On curiosity side, many profile says women only, but most in their friends are men. Go figure that out!!!!! Lol

    #456517
    Gumdrops (ToT)
    Participant
    • Female
    • Looking for: Male
    • USA
    • Missouri

    Nick, a gay or lesbian person can have same sex or alternate sex conversation and friends. They’re just not looking for a heterosexual partnership.

    #456827
    Brooke
    Participant
    • Female
    • Looking for: Female
    • USA
    • Washington state

    Thank you for saying this. I have had experiences out in the real world where I am approached by men who are not receptive to “I’m sorry but I’m only attracted to women.” I’ve gotten crass comments like “oh, I bet your girlfriend is hot, too.” Or “that’s okay, I don’t mind. We can still go in a date.”

    I mind!! This is who I am and it makes me so sad when people like, try to talk me out of it or just pretend that it’s not there, you know? I wish more people would try to imagine how bad that would feel.

    #456998
    Welshie🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿
    Participant
    • Female
    • Looking for: Male
    • United Kingdom

    If I had a £1 for every message I’ve had from someone across the pond, when my profile states I’m looking for someone fairly local, I’d have enough money to have moved there by now 😂

    I joke, but it gets really frustrating when I’m repeatedly getting messages from people who aren’t even close to what I’m looking for, but always seem to think that they’re the exception I’m waiting for 😞

    #457141
    Pigeon
    Participant
    • Female
    • Looking for: Male
    • USA
    • Michigan

    I had a guy message me who was way too young and lived way too far away. I asked him what it was about my profile that prompted him to reach out, which was of course followed by a pause while he actually went and read it. He replied to say he didn’t like [one element from my profile] anyway, and immediately blocked me. HE blocked ME. It still makes me shake my head.

    #457158
    Brooke
    Participant
    • Female
    • Looking for: Female
    • USA
    • Washington state

    What a dweeb!

    I feel like some people just don’t read profiles >.>

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