There was a time when women were worshipped as goddesses, revered as life-givers, creators, and sensual beings. Their bodies were sacred temples, their sexuality a force of power and creation although they were also feared, as man fears that which he cannot understand. Ancient societies celebrated the erotic as an intrinsic part of the human experience, understanding that feminine energy held the keys to both pleasure and power. Women were sexually expressive, unapologetically alive, and deeply connected to their desires.
But this reverence didn’t last. As patriarchy took hold, beginning with the institutional dominance of the Church in the 4th century, women’s sexual autonomy was systematically erased. Their bodies became battlegrounds, their desires demonized, their pleasure silenced. The goddess was replaced with the sinner, and women were burdened with shame that robbed them of their birthright: the ability to revel in their bodies, their desires, and their pleasure.
“For centuries, women’s sexual desires were medicalized as hysteria or madness. The message was clear: a sexually expressive woman was an aberration.”
– Emily Nagoski, Come As You Are
It’s time for women to reclaim that birthright. It’s time for women to remember that they are not sinners or objects—they are goddesses, capable of profound eroticism and power.
The Sacred Past: Women as Goddesses
In ancient civilizations, women embodied sensuality and creation. Goddesses like Ishtar, Aphrodite, and Hathor were venerated for their fertility, beauty, and sexual energy. Their followers understood something we have since forgotten: sexuality is not something to fear or control; it is something to celebrate.
During these times, women had agency over their bodies and their relationships. They were sexually expressive, not inhibited by shame or societal constraints. Sex was not a transaction or obligation—it was a divine experience. The erotic wasn’t just a physical act but a spiritual connection, a way of tapping into life’s deepest pleasures.
The Fall: How Patriarchy and Religion Stole the Goddess
This celebration of female sexuality came under attack as patriarchal systems emerged, solidifying male control over women’s bodies and choices. The Church weaponized Eve’s story, turning female sexuality into the root of sin. Women who expressed desire were labeled witches, temptresses, or madwomen. Their bodies were medicalized, pathologized, and policed.
The repercussions of this vilification are still with us today. Many women grow up ashamed of their bodies, disconnected from their desires, and unable to fully embrace their sexuality. This is often why it is difficult for them to have conversations about sexuality including erotic lactation, or even be sexual with their bodies when with their partners, (how many women can admit to self-pleasure or masturbate with their partners?). Even if they want to, they are fighting an inner war. I know as over a decade ago I was one of them… As Emily Nagoski explains in Come As You Are, women’s sexual desires have been misunderstood, feared, and suppressed for centuries, leaving many feeling alienated from pleasure itself. We are often conditioned to feel shame about our bodies and to suppress the enjoyment of a healthy, fulfilling sexuality—especially in Mediterranean cultures deeply influenced by Catholic traditions. To complicate matters, partners can sometimes reinforce this stigma. In my own experience, whenever I initiated intimacy or expressed a higher-than-average desire, I was unfairly labeled a “nymphomaniac.” I know I’m not alone in this.
Many men, ironically, confess—whether openly or in private—that they wish their partners would embrace their sexuality more fully and desire intimacy more often. Or dread bringing up the subject of lactation or anything sexual, for fear they will shut-down yet secretly fantasize abut having a deeper connection with their partners and more fulfilling sex-life. For this transformation to unfold, it is essential for a woman to reconnect with herself and awaken her inner goddess—a journey of rediscovering her voice, reclaiming her libido, and breaking free from the patriarchal chains that have long suppressed her desires. A woman who embraces this empowerment becomes not only comfortable in her own skin but radiates the erotic essence of a goddess: powerful, independent, and unapologetically in control of her body and desires. She becomes a modern Magdalene, fully owning her sexuality and understanding the depth of her sensuality.
This awakening, especially when paired with feeling safe and supported by a man, is one of the most liberating experiences a woman can have. It’s akin to releasing a genie from its bottle—a surge of freedom that can elevate her sexuality to extraordinary new heights, whether she is single or in a relationship. A woman who embraces her ability to experience sexual pleasure alone and express her desires without shame steps into the best sex of her life. She emanates an irresistible, addictive, and captivating erotic energy that is both magnetic and bewitching. As a personal example, inducing lactation this year was an incredibly powerful experience for me. All women have this power and carry the Goddess within. But this cannot be achieved through demands. Sex and sexuality must be revered as sacred, a profound connection rather than an expectation. True sexual alchemy unfolds only when you treat a woman as the goddess she is, honoring her essence and awakening the ancient power that women have carried through the ages. In doing so, she can reclaim that power as her own, embodying her full sensual and divine self.
Reclaiming the Erotic
So how do we undo centuries of repression? How do we return to a world where women feel empowered, safe, and free to explore their desires? The answer lies in reclaiming the erotic, as Audre Lorde so beautifully describes in her essay, Uses of the Erotic: The Erotic as Power.
Lorde reminds us that the erotic is more than just sexual. It’s a deep, affirming power that connects us to joy, creativity, and ourselves. “The erotic,” she writes, “is a resource within each of us that lies in a deeply female and spiritual plane, firmly rooted in the power of our unexpressed or unrecognized feeling.” When women embrace this power, they dismantle the structures that seek to control them.
Practical Steps to Empower Women’s Sexuality
1. Honesty and Safety:
Esther Perel, in Mating in Captivity, emphasizes the importance of creating environments where women feel safe and valued. Honesty in relationships fosters trust, which allows women to open up and express their desires without fear of judgment.
2. Reframe Sexuality as Sacred:
Anaïs Nin, a pioneer in exploring feminine eroticism, wrote, “The body is an instrument which only gives off music when it is used as a whole.” To embrace sexuality, women must learn to see their bodies as vessels of joy and artistry, not shame.
3. Reject Shame:
Nagoski advocates for dismantling harmful myths about women’s bodies and desires. By learning about the science of arousal and pleasure, women can move past guilt and toward self-acceptance.
4. Celebrate the Erotic in Everyday Life:
Lorde teaches that the erotic isn’t just about sex—it’s about fully inhabiting your life. Whether through dance, art, or sensual self-care, women can reconnect with their bodies and desires.
5. Treat Women Like Goddesses:
A culture that treats women with reverence rather than control allows them to reclaim their autonomy. When women are celebrated, they feel safe to explore and express their sexuality without fear or shame.
A Bold, Sensual Future
The time has come for women to shed the chains of repression and reclaim their place as goddesses. By learning from history and embracing modern insights from thinkers like Perel, Nagoski, Lorde, and Nin, women can rewrite the narrative of their sexuality. They can embrace their bodies as sacred, their desires as powerful, and their pleasure as a right—not a privilege.
When women reclaim the erotic, they reclaim their lives. They become uninhibited, expressive, and unapologetically alive. They reconnect with the ancient wisdom of their ancestors, stepping boldly into a future where they are not just women, but creators, lovers, and goddesses once more…
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Elayne (Sophia Unveiled)
There is a reason that Jewish men are considered one of the best lovers partners experience. It’s backed by science and data. Yes, the Universalist (definition of catholic started suppressing the the glorification of women for their natural leadership abilities.
https://jewishjournal.com/commentary/359187/how-to-be-a-good-jewish-lover-the-basics/
Darby thanks so much for that, I will agree that sexuality is important in Jewish beliefs (multiply and be plentiful) 😉 Will check out that article and thanks for posting it for all to read, also for reading my blog and leaving me a comment! x
The power of women also comes from the power of the Mother Earth. In many traditions, bountiful nature, fecund/nurturing mother earth, active rivers have been given female names for a reason.
One of the eastern traditions has an origin story suggesting that the universe is pure consciousness, is male, and is like potential energy, whereas female energy is kinetic in nature, and initiates a stir or spark in pure consciousness resulting in the cosmic dance of creation or the Big Bang and everything else that happens after that culminating in the universe we have today.
Women have been warriors, nurturers, home makers, and every other profession in the world. Women embody the qualities of beauty, loveliness, kindness, empathy, grace, patience, love❤️, peace, sexuality etc in many different traditions.
We need to think about women and women’s sexuality as important aspects of creation and vital to true happiness. But again, sexuality was always considered divine whether it was male or female.
Many men have no idea of what women go through in this world or are unaware/afraid of the depth of female power when it’s unleashed. It’s like mother nature, treat her well and she’s bountiful however when she unleashes, her fury is very powerful.
Cannot agree more, thank you for that detailed valuable comment!
I’ll add that many women are aware of this force within them and afraid of it, which is why they are awkward about sex or even talking about it. Not just with ABF but in general as society has made them feel ashamed of their own sexuality and natural impulses, promoting the image of a chaste Virgin Mary but denying her of any sexuality at all, portraying that as sin.
This unfortunately, regardless our religious beliefs, is still a huge obstacle for healthy sexuality as women have been indoctrinated since Christianity to be submissive and also asexual, sex being only the means to procreate but never for pleasure or to connect with your partner which I find really sad.
Thanks again for your comment!
You are very welcome 🤗
That’s a very important point about fear that is sometimes subconscious and conditioned. It’s a common practice in patriarchal societies to do this so common that we have to step back to see the pattern.