It’s almost 2 am here in the Emerald Isle… I was going to share a different blog post, but felt that this time of night is all about confessions and conversations that should take place under the stars.
A couple of years ago, I never imagined I’d be here—on this site, writing about passions that now consume me or sharing secrets of antiquity that can make our lives better, especially in terms of intimacy and well-being. Fate has a way of both surprising us and tearing us apart, and often, this destruction is necessary for our rebirth. It’s a kind of death in life, a “dark night of the soul,” where we unbecome who we are to become who we were always meant to be.
Pain and grief enter our lives as messengers, warning us to change our ways. They drag us into the deepest abyss, not to punish us, but to guide us toward our true destiny. This transformation begins when we stop resisting and embrace the pain, acknowledging what we cannot change. Though this dark gift may terrify us, if we dare to unwrap it, sit with it, and truly embrace it, it may turn out to be the greatest gift of all. In fact, Jungian Dr. Jean Shinoda Bolen speaks about crises being opportunities; liminal moments in time that gift us with the space we need to grow, rebuild and start over…She has a great Ted Talk I recommend which you can watch here – Crisis as a turning point: the gift of liminal time.
I’ve been on this site for just over a month, initially for research; but like Mary Shelley’s “Frankenstein,” my mission has taken on a life of its own, leading me into uncharted territory. In fact, several prominent studies have examined the psychological motivation for Frankenstein’s creation of the monster, many of which intersect aspects of grief; unfortunately something may of us have in common, even if we are yet to meet or do not speak about it. I’ve crossed paths with some of you, both publicly and privately. As part of my research and because I practice what I preach, I have been inducing too and it’s been an emotional rollercoaster, a cathartic journey guided by my heart—a journey that has, at times, taken my breath away, left me in tears, or wrapped me in the warmth of connection. In these dreamlike moments, tears and confessions have forged unexpected friendships. And as I sit here, typing into the chilly night, staying true to my heart, I feel, despite the pain and grief—or perhaps because of them—that I am where I was meant to be.
Tonight, I want to share this video with a song—a ceremony of heartbreak, grief, and the bittersweet acknowledgment of the pain and bliss that coexist in every moment, if we’re open to receive them. When darkness enters your life, accept its invitation and listen closely to what it has to say. Though it may be painful, it could change your life in ways you never imagined.
Thank you to all who have crossed my path, read my posts, or reached out to me. I am just a girl following her heart, caring deeply for everyone I meet on this journey. Many of you have shared your struggles, and together we’ve found comfort, whether through marital issues, disappointment, or simply the trials of life. I don’t have all the answers—I’m still learning, still seeking my own “Magnum Opus”, my philosopher’s stone through spiritual transformation. As in the Hávamál sayings of Óðinn, the All-Father, Norse god of poetry, magic, death and wisdom, wisdom is born when we come together and speak. And this blog is all about wisdom, “Sophia” personified wisdom as the feminine life-creation aspect of the creator but also divine spark in all living things that connects them.
So let’s keep talking, sharing, and learning from each other… and above all, stay true. It will be worth it.
Contact me:
Elayne (Sophia Unveiled)
Beautiful post, let feeling be more than a source of pain but a door to wisdom!
Thank you so much Ambrosia, indeed, there is a scholar whose work I treasure who writes about this; a clinical psychologist from Colombia University, Lisa Miller, who wrote “The Awakened Brain” and who’s done Youtubes with Deepak Chopra, known for his work in spirituality, less known for being a neurosurgeon! Depression & spiritual awakening: 2 sides of one door, I will leave it here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7c5t6FkvUG0&t=2s
To be happy and healthy we need harmony, of body, mind and spirit! I do not have all the things I wanted in life, and may never have them, but even so, I am happier than I’ve ever been and can keep getting up every time I’m knocked down like Freyja or indeed, rising from my ashes like the Phoenix because I have harmony of all three. I also know myself deeply, what I need and do not need/want and strongly connected to my soul and the universe, and all its creatures in it, as you know through my work with wildlife and marine conservation. I belong to life…
Beautiful thoughts. The concept of rebirth remedies the sorrow that life is inherently painful, as our fate is to return to ashes. This reminds me of the Phoenix, the national bird of Lebanon. Beirut has been destroyed and rebuilt seven times throughout its history, reflecting the rebirth, renewal and immortality of a Phoenix.
Each undulation of the sea’s waves, the transformation of a caterpillar into a butterfly, the snake shedding its skin and the phases of the moon, from new moon to full, are powerful examples of nature’s renewal cycles.
Nature often serves as a sanctuary that mirrors existence, offering wisdom and meaning. Its cyclical patterns symbolize a daily opportunity for rebirth, a blessing that encourages us to embrace each day with renewed hope and purpose, transcending suffering into transformation.
Thank you, I appreciate your kind words and what you have shared. Life is painful and unfair, but we can find great beauty in it too and amazing moments. I don’t regret all that happened to me, I don’t think I needed it to become who I am as I have always been this way BUT…maybe I did need it to lead me to where I am now in terms of life, geography and the people I allow in my life. That has been my transformation and walking away from things not meant for me. When we do this and have the strength to not “settle” and to say “no” to things not meant for us…life rewards us for following our heart and being true. I believe in this and also in the promise of hope that tomorrow brings. Every day is a blank new canvas…and I am excited about every single one that I may ever paint!
I really appreciate you sharing these words and both of you for taking the time to watch and leave a message. It is so important to live at the body, mind and soul level. Especially in our personal lives, I hope to contribute to this with this blog and for all of us to keep sharing. Wishing you a great weekend!
Thanks, as always, for sharing your thoughts so beautifully! Since you are into Jungian ideas, I’d love to hear your perspective on shadow work at some point…
You are very welcome and thank you for your friendship and the supportive comments on my posts. I actually trained on the shadow and specialise on it, have some notes and things I can send your way too from when I did my Diploma on this, but in essence the shadow is what the black madonnas are all about, the repressed aspects of the self and what we are ashamed of. If we do not embrace them and acknowledge them, they take over and run the show.
For example, many people are on here are too ashamed to confess their desire of ABF to their partners or that they have needs, due to society making this a taboo etc. But what is going on there is that by trying to suppress it, or find escapism by say watching porn or being on here but not really tackling the issue head on, for some people what they feel is becoming more impossible to manage and in many ways making them miserable. I have had quite a few men write and share this with me.
Another example of the shadow for example is in women, where society teaches them to be submissive and not voice their desires or wants, some do, but not fully, because they are taught that desire is sinful eve with their partners. Sex is a touchy subject as often when associating it with women, women are made to look immoral and ashamed of having a shadow side. I know I was, we can see this in the archetypes. I was a homemaker a “Frigg” as opposed to a Freya in the Norse world or goddess Venus/Aphrodite/Lilith, a submissive doormat. Now, well I let these goddesses run the show at times and really run with it, wearing various archetypes as dresses to acknowledge the shadow.