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Had Quite a romantic conversation with someone moments ago * Name changed for obvious reason* Am I in the wrong here for feeling slightly offended?
GENTLEMAN #1 10 minutes ago
Hey Lizzie, I’m going to be visiting northeast indiana for the labor day weekend. Wondering if you would be interested in a breast play session while I am in the area. My family is there, so I visit a couple of times a year. I am open to a one-time thing or more than once when I’m in town if any of that works for you.Lizzie 9 minutes ago
im not really into random hookups im sorry!GENTLEMAN #1 9 minutes ago
what are you looking for?Lizzie 8 minutes ago
someone who sees me as a human being and not a random toy they schedule for their labor day holiday weekend 🙂Your feelings are spot on. It is YOUR choice who you see or who GETS to see you. Don’t let those individuals ruin or discourage what you are seeking. Your body, your rules.
XOXOXOXOXO
MarshallHello Lizzie ,
Some members are looking for one offs/casual . It doesn’t state on your profile what you’re looking for so he probably just took a punt .
Maybe flesh your profile out a bit ?
I hope you’re okay 😊He was a jerk for not letting it go at “No.” On the other hand, your indignation invested the exchange with more importance than it merited. A polite “no” should suffice for anybody not raised in a barn. If that doesn’t end the conversation, as in his case it seems not to have, there is a button to block all further contact. Use it. You are under no obligation to explain yourself.
If you feel other people ought to be protected as well, contact Michael @ admin. It is his website and his responsibility to make sure every one feels safe here. I am sure he knows how to cancel accounts and will not hesitate to do so.
My own rule is that I am entitled to proposition the Queen of England herself if I do it politely. After being turned down, a second proposition to the same woman is begging, which is beneath my dignity. A third proposition is stalking, and merits the attention of the local constabulary.
In my opinion the question asked by the guy is perfectly fair. This is niche area and as such there aren’t many people. If there’s someone in the area you’ll be in (either travelling or living) then introduce yourself. He explained what he was doing and what he was looking, so no deception.
You are right to decline if it’s not for you, obviously. Thank you for replying, not many people do.
However, the guys second question ‘what are you looking for?’ is perfectly reasonable small talk. Again, it’s a niche site. If you don’t want to talk after the first reply, don’t.
I don’t think your response about being a human being was warranted and slightly unfair on the guy.
Hi Lizzie –
I’m feeling your pain. I keep getting contacted by men here as if I’m a free boob hooker – as if I would just whip the girls out for any guy who happens to be passing through town, including one who had a whole proposal (that he had clearly copy/pasted) about how much he would offer towards ME coming to stay in a hotel near HIM.
I’m new to this site – is that what it’s all about? How are people “building intimate relationships” that are endemic to ANR… with random strangers?
I had one guy (6,000 miles away, mind you), suggest that I was going about it all wrong – and that I should just give random guys access to my body with the hope that one of them might end up being someone I was interesting having a relationship with. Oh, thanks, dude, for mansplaining access to my body.
Or guys who ROMANTICALLY initiate contact by starting the conversation with, “Hi, I want to suck your tits.” Um…yeah… that’s what the site is all about. I’m sorry, dude… you must be THIS smart to ride THIS ride.
Sigh. Frustrating.
It is ABF Heaven. Not ANR Heaven. Both ABF and ANR are valid choices. ABF is more on the sexual experience and is usually limited to one-time episodes or a limited relationship or no relationship at all.
ANR is more about the intimate relationship that involves suckling and requires greater commitment and connection.I am seeking a new ANR, but until I find it, I am also seeking ABF. So I will ask, politely and respectfully, about the possibility. If the woman has indicated she is only looking for ANR, then I don’t inquire about possible ABF. If she hasn’t indicated, then I will check to see if
ABF is a possibility. If the answer is no, I will usually thank them for their time and wish them well in their search. I don’t think I’d ask what they were looking for– that seems a bit rude, since I can infer it from their response to my question. But I also expect the same respect from the woman that I offered her. I don’t judge what you are looking for, please don’t judge what I am looking for.ABF and ANR are a spectrum and we all self-define exactly where we land on the line. And the ANR and ABF community is small and taboo– so we really can’t afford to segregate even further. It’s hard finding an ANR partner. It’s hard finding an ABF partner. Let’s try to support one another where and when we can.
Unless you are a jerk– in which case, bugger off.
I think the largest issue here for me is the absolute lack of courtesy to even introduce himself, give any information about himself but expected something from me. I think sexual intent or not the basics of introducing himself should have been met. Im glad to see other opinions though!
Lizzie, I missed that basic point of courtesy. You are absolutely right about that…
Lizzie, this is an interesting issue. Would you be ok with me adding it to the front page “Featured” section? With a link to your profile ?
A “No thanks!” is fine , I realise it’s a slightly difficult subject.
Absolutely, I posted it for good reason! I am particularly in the wrong here for my quick judgment and less than ladylike reply. I think its a good place to start when it comes to opening the conversation on “How to open the conversation”
I will admit to being the gentleman in question.
I see now how I could have handled it a bit better and extend an apology for the “reservation-like” manner in which i wrote that, but I will add the following:
1. as someone else mentioned, your ad has no details. some ladies are fine with a one-time thing, but I couldn’t tell that from your ad. when I asked what specifically you were looking for, I got what I thought was a rude response to a legit question. Plus you then blocked me so I could no longer clear up any miscommunication and apologize, which was my intention.
2. I didn’t include a full description of me because I have typed out an ad that you could click on to learn more about me. I didn’t know it was necessary in a message to repeat my ad, but I’ve noted that for future reference.
It is not my intention to make anyone feel like less than a whole person, and I see how my communication was not sufficient in that regard. I’m man enough to admit my mistakes and I made one in this case.
Lizzie
I have read all the feed back from your post. Truth is most do not read your profile before sending a message. Most are not looking for a relationship. 80% of my messages are hey can I suck on your “tits”Guys this is not how to get a women’s attention no matter if it is for one night or a serious relationship.
Both men and women should always be respectful.
I have been in nursing relationships for 7 yrs now. I belong to 3 ABF/ANR websites .
I have learned to ask questions and take everything with a grain of salt. When sending messages things can be misunderstood until you have several conversations with that person to have a full understanding of what you are both looking for then make a decision if you want to continue. Also it’s always good after a few messages to talk on the phone with that person. You can get a better feel for that person.
Be kind to one another.
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