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Every go on an ABF date, look at the person in front of you, and just feel so gross you questioning all of your life choices? What did you do next? Stick it out for the win, or find any excuse to bail?
Perhaps make your first meets having a drink? Easy then to leave nicely then (win, win).
Just say to the woman your not feeling it, thanks for coming, nice to meet them etcI personally couldnt be with someone I’m not attracted to so I would have the drink or coffee or whatever was on offer and politely excuse myself wishing them all the best. If however they were deceptive about themselves in any way ie 20 years older then they said or telling me they had an athletic figure but in reality are massive I’ll let them know how deceitful they are and not too politely either and leave immediately.
It’s been really helpful for me to have at least one phone conversation and at least one video conversation before meeting in person.
This way you’re not surprised by whatever image you’ve either built up in your head or whatever they have told you about themselves.
You know now who they are to some extent and know they are real.
And we both feel so much more comfortable meeting in person the first time. There’s none of that anxiety there about such big unknowns.
Good luck and I hope you find your special someone.Errr don’t know about “feel so gross you questioning all of your life choices”, but I would treat meeting someone off here like any other date and do something low pressure if I’m meeting them for the first time.
Like grabbing a coffee, drink, or ice cream, walking and chatting etc. If you don’t like the vibes then you can still chat for a bit then (politely) say you don’t think they’re your type or you’re not feeling it. If you like them then you can say you want to meet again.
Lol my mind wants to know what made it so gross for you?
The closest I had to “gross” is someone showing up with chew in their mouth. That was a completely a “hard no, and thank you for coming”. Which is why I now tell ppl smoking/chewing/vanity is a hard limit.
Actually, I wouldn’t bail on a date unless my she was verbal abusive. And at the end of the date, I ask if we could nurse, regardless of attraction. Yeah… I’m a boob slut lol. I just had a really bad week, full of rejections. The question was more based on the way I feel right now. I’ve been into ABF since 2006 and I’ve actually never gone on a date (with someone interested in ABF) and not nursed at the end… until this week. I got 2 in person rejections, and 2 additional online ones from very friendly contacts. It’s been the worst week ever, and I really feel terrible about everything. To be fair though, I spent this week in St. Louis and there’s literally so much to do here, I can kind of see how platonic dating could be the expected norm across the board (maybe???). Still, unexpected rejections, from enthusiastic contacts makes you feel like something is seriously wrong with you. Either way, I feel like I need to take a break from the search for a while, at least till My traveling days are over. The emotional toll way too high.
I’d consider an ABF date to be a date with another person that’s expressed interest in nursing. Though, I guess the degree of interest can be ambiguous. One should be pretty sure… but honestly, I’m always suspicious of the “sure thing”
Those are really good suggestions! Yeah, the video chat would have let me get to ‘no’ without nearly as much emotional investment.
Think back to the dates and think if there was anything you said or did that may have turned them off.
You said you ask if you could nurse regardless of attraction. If I was a woman I would find this a turn off and insulting. You are nursing from a human being not a pair of breasts with legs.
Perhaps you come across as too eager which can be a turn off.
We talked online for a month. I felt like we had a real connection. “a pair of breasts with legs” is hateful, and not something that anyone should ever say.
Hi Avery, I just read your profile and it’s ambiguous to me what you’re looking for. You say you want nsa sexual abf, that it’s a light kink and you say at the end that she shouldn’t assume that you’ll enter a relationship unless the chemistry is right.
Not a criticism, but it’s really not clear to me what you’re seeking.I’m confused by your response. No where in my profile do I mention sex or anything sexual. I’m looking for:
Fun ABF focused conversations,
role playing,
casual coffee, and
platonic NSA ABF as a soft kink.In other words: No strings attached adult breast feeding.
I consider that itself to be a soft kink.
Id there anything else you are confused about?
If you feel my profile is confusing, Please focus on someone you find more relatable.
I recommend video chat before meeting and if in person it’s still a turn off.. I simply say.. I don’t think we’re a match..
I’ve called it off twice at the first meetup bc of poor hygiene.. how hard is it to shower before meeting someone for the first time? C’mon now..
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