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@budcotten2342 thanks OG Joe
@foxgoddess thanks FG, shows were all different. Id rather meet in person face to face as soon as possible. I need to look in someone’s eyes and see their face to know. But video helps with that part too. I hope you find what you’re looking for and I appreciate you.
For me it’s not a question of when to meet, as there are so many variables that can come in to play. For me, it’s about, when not meeting has dragged on too long. So often, you meet someone online, and click, the chemistry seems to be right, you look forward to chatting with them regularly, and everything seems to be lined up, but they won’t pull the trigger and meet. They say they want to, but don’t make it happen. That to me, is the bigger issue. I will also add that 6 hours or whatever distance is immaterial in the world we live in now. With cheap flights, video chat, and even remote work, you can really connect with anyone from anywhere, if the effort is there.
@effervescent1
Thank you, I feel the same way and it’s the dragging on that concerns me.Yup, that’s where I differ. If I were looking for a “partner”, my sense of caution when it comes to such a life changing decision, would really make the pace much slower. I wouldn’t even be pressed for an actual meeting or getting physical for months.
The irony here is I thought my contribution to this thread had been chewed up by the site when I got an error message. I got messages commenting on it and that’s how I learnt that it actually did get posted.
But here’s the drawback. Male brains have honed in on our decision to meet 5 minutes into our phone call.
In the small print, the dude and I first corresponded 6 years ago. Politely. Without smut, fantastical cyber sex . Appreciating when the time wasn’t right. Out of the blue last week, he reaches out again after a 2 year silence. The stars are aligned. We got on the call. And mutually decided, let’s make this happen tonight.
Do I make decisions to pursue intimacy on this level in 5 minutes? NO.
Can your first interaction with me be asking if we can meet, without any attempt at ice breaking or getting to know me as a person? Good luck with that!
Case in point, a polite enough first message informing that he was in London on a visit and would like to see me.
My reasonably polite response asking how long he’d be here for. More a way to keep the conversation going while I fished for gut instinct feelers.
His response being that he leaves this evening.
That’s next level sense of entitlement shit, right there.
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