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I’ve struggled with this for a long time now, I certainly cannot be alone.
Attraction is very subjective of course, for all of us. But there has to be some spark for me, some physical attraction.
How do you let someone know, in a nice way, that they are not your type? After they have sent you a pic.
Ghosting is unkind and it’s been done to me. Yet I’ve men have gotten mad at me for saying, I am sorry, but you’re not my type”.
Of course having a photo of at least some part or all of your face would prevent this from happening along with a description of how you look in your profile.
But I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.
Amy advice or thoughts would be appreciated.
“I am sorry, but you’re not my type” was a direct, clean, and polite answer. No respectful person should be “mad” at you. If it happened, it would not be your problem, but theirs, for being immature.
i usually say your not my type lol. If there feelings get hurt….well thats there deal. I try to just keep my side of the street clean.
I agree with all of the above. It would really be helpful if guys would put a picture or partial picture in their avatar. Even then, sometimes once you’ve seen a full picture there is no attraction and there does need to be some for this to work.
You were polite and direct. There isn’t much more one can do. You are not alone in this issue.
I think being honest and clear is best. Much better than not responding and blocking them.
Everyone seems to agree on this, that Deb has communicated properly.
One point to add regarding “guys would put a picture or partial picture in their avatar”. It would be a good idea. but there may be privacy concerns preventing some men from posting our photos in public part of the site. Women have the same issue too, as I clearly see.Sometimes I say I am sorry I dont feel we are a match. Or I am sorry I am not interested on a different site I have had someone get upset and start calling me names and saying I am fake but that just cements my thought that we are not a match.
Personally, I’d rather know and be direct. I’m totally fine with, “sorry, your not my type”. Trying to be gentler may just leave a door open that you are really trying to close.
Thank you all. Great feedback. Especially you, TREE 🤣❤️
Just block them and they are out of your universe once and for all.
I’m in agreement that a polite “I don’t think we would be compatible” or even a more blunt “you’re not my type” is the best course of action. In my humble opinion, it’s FAR better to have someone be honest and straightforward and tell me they aren’t interested, as opposed to being ghosted or, even worse, being unceremoniously blocked. Any man (or woman) who gets offended by this kind of honesty lacks the self-confidence to understand that physical attraction is subjective. Speaking for myself… if someone tells me they aren’t interested… I thank them for their honesty, and then I don’t contact them again. I don’t get bent out of shape about it. If you are honest with someone and they become annoying or belligerent about it, THEN it’s definitely time to block them. They’re only proving that you were right to reject them in the first place.
As a side note… in response to the posts about adding a picture to your profile… I would LOVE to add a picture to my profile. However, because of my job, if it became known that I was a member of this site, I would lose my job in a hurry. Unfortunately, there is a HUGE stigma in our society about breasts, and the idea of adult nursing is still offensive and controversial to most people. So I don’t post a picture. If I make contact with someone… I share pictures as soon as they want me to.
Another side note… I notice that I’ve been blocked by the person who posted the original thread in this conversation. I have no idea why, and don’t recall ever seeing this profile, or contacting this person. Very interesting…….
One prospect replied, “You’re not my type. Take care.” It may seem blunt but it does not leave room for further discussion. If the person continues to press the issue it would be appropriate to block.
Thank you for the good responses, it seems that letting someone know they’re not your type is the best way to go and how they take it from there is up to them.
As far as blocking goes, per sine comments. I assure you, if I’ve blocked you, I had a good reason to do so, it may not be obvious to you.
I also think if you don’t have a photo on your profile or even half a face profile then it’s nice to send a pic immediately with your first correspondence. Saves the woman the trouble of having to ask. Or as some people do put your photo in your media and have it set for only friends to view. Then ask the person to friend request you so they can see your photo.
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