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The female user who created this post deleted her account, but in order to keep her post active it has been switched over to the admin account. Her original posting is below the dotted line.
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So I’ve never had a AN relationship. I only found out this was a thing a couple years ago. I’ve been single off and on since I’ve been learning. Always being respectful of my relationship boundaries.
My boyfriend knows I like my nipples played with and sucked. But as you know, for us, that’s no where near enough. I’m not not happy, but god I want him to catch on and figure out that I love to be sucked. For you men this might sound amazing, but if you love someone and want to be with them, and it’s really really really good but maybe just not fucking great…do I coach? Do I discuss? Do I tame my expectations? Do I walk? I don’t want to walk. I want him to get it and want it. But I want to be honest and kind too. K. Thoughts?
You definitely need to communicate your needs to him. If he’s smart he will love it. If not, then at least you know what you are dealing with and can make a decision from there.
An honest discussion is the only way to go, especially if you want to stay with him. It doesn’t have to be awkward, you just sit down and say “I need a b c to feel more fulfilled in our relationship, and I would so appreciate if you did x y z for me. How do you feel about that? Is there anything I can do to help you feel comfortable about it?” And see where it goes from there.
Build on the relationship and coach him. If he is receptive, he’s a keeper. If he isn’t you have some decisions to make.
Best of luck to you.I would hope he encourages hearing the intimate secrets of what revs your engines…. If he does like hearing from you in that regard, then spill all the beans and tell him indepth details!! And if he doesn’t, then may I suggest handing him a book on the subject, or link to a website, perhaps!!
Good luck to you both.
JohnWow. Thank you gentlemen. I’ll just try and bring it up. I just don’t want him to think I’m some sort of like whatever. I just really like my nipples being sucked. It feels really good. It feels like some weird guilty pleasure.
I can see this account has been deleted, but in case you check back or in case it’s useful to someone else reading this who is in a similar situation, I thought I might as well reply anyway.
As with anything in a relationship, communication is key. Always talk about everything with your partner. If communication is not open and honest, you can’t expect to have your needs met. I hope you figure it out together or find yourself in a more fulfilling situation.The original poster sounds exactly like the younger me. My waking nightmare would be to end up in this bind in my twilight years.
Communication should be the key. But for some reason, with Adult breast feeding, it’s seldom enough.
Why do I say this? Because a perfunctory box ticking exercise is not what we ladies want.
We want to file away the memories of expressions of delight, awe, relief, and dare I say, gratitude. The facial expressions that affirm that there’s nothing guilty about this pleasure.
That we don’t have to feel we’re being unreasonable to want more.
The person she describes as being her other half, pleasant enough as he sounds, does not have “can suckle for hours” in his job description. He may change things around, but off guard she’ll catch him glancing at the clock in the room. Not because he’s legitimately got a train to catch. But because he’s wondering if he’s done enough yet.
There’ll be times that he unconsciously slips back into the old programme.
Communication will likely change what he chooses to do next, and how. But communication will never impact how he REALLY feels about it.
As the lady, or man, that loves having their nipples sucked, we don’t want to be sucked out of pity. It’s what I’ve long called a “pity suck”. Like its pity fuck counterpart, it’s a car crash event during intimacy.
I wouldn’t want to be in her shoes. I’m on this site to avoid slipping into the wrong pair of shoes ever again.
But, should she return to the site, I’d like her to prove me wrong. I’d welcome any lady in her shoes to prove me wrong.
I know what you’re saying, June, if it is the case that adult breastfeeding is not for him. It may just be a case of him not knowing that it’s a thing. To be honest, I didn’t realise it was a thing in it’s own right, outside of adult babies, until I watched a documentary about 2 years ago!
I always enjoyed my breasts getting a lot of attention, and I was always asking my (now ex) husband to play with them more and suck my nipples during foreplay and sex. He obliged, but much as you described, without enthusiasm. My former ANR partner showed me what it’s all about and now there’s no going back lol, he totally spoilt me 😭🤣
Having been in a nursing relationship, I know I could never be in any relationship, or indeed any sexual interaction, without that element. Even if the other person agreed to do it for my sake, it wouldn’t be the same because I would know their heart wasn’t in it, so that would take the magic out of it for me. I prefer to stay single and celibate if I can’t have the real thing, but each to their own. Some people are just not cut out for it I guess, so they settle.
Speaking as a Man, I absolutely love and appreciate straight talk. Especially this kind, where you’re not criticizing, but simply expressing needs and wants. It’s sexy. It demonstrates a level of self-confidence, maturity, trust, and intimacy. It checks all the boxes. Most Men by nature want to provide and please. Let them!
Michael, you just wanted Tiger’s phone number, didn’t you? 😉🤣
*eyes glaze over in polyamory*
(Lol please read this with the humor it is intended! Long standing ENM/polyam joke that 99% of monogamous relationship problems can be “fixed” with polyamory. Pro tip: that’s not how it works 🤣)
In all seriousness, though, what others have said is absolutely true. It could just be he doesn’t yet know it’s a thing and she won’t know if they can work it out until they have a good honest talk about it. I didn’t know polyamory was a thing and it’s been my bloody relationship orientation all along 😅🤦🏻♀️
I hope OP is able to have a good discussion and get resolution either way. Living life with that large of a need unfulfilled and the accompanying shame of hiding it from a partner can be soul crushing.
I know the original poster is gone from the site now. And I know I have very little experience in working out these kinds of details in a relationship. But it concerns me that some people think we all robots fixed in our preprogrammed ideals and lifestyles. I know many are because of some things are very ingrained in our psyches, but we are talking about real love here. I don’t think many couples jive in every part of a new relationship. And the sexual side of relationships is where many amendments pop up often. Reminds me of the old joke about “Why is the bride always smiling in her wedding photos?… Because she knows she has given her last BJ.”
Every guy that is in love with a partner wants her to be pleased into oblivion in their alone time. And if he has ingrained thoughts that make it harder, he will have to review it all and decide what to change and adjust. But to say that from Day 1 he must be a pro at every act that makes her experience the ecstatic or he is not suitable or worthy of her is so myopic. Couples must change and evolve many times if not daily to please each other. It is even possible that someday some of our women here will not still crave nursing as much as they do today. It is possible.
For us, it will always be best to find a person that shares and finds beauty and joy in nursing, but please don’t discount the guy that can learn to enjoy and share this beautiful side of you too. If he can appreciate the vulnerable and caring side of you in himself, I venture to guess he is well on his way to sharing enthusiastically and wholly in anything that he can share with you. You are worth sharing anything with. Of this I am sure. Love conquers all!!! In time.
I hope this is received well…
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